Seeking treatment

After debating on our next steps, we decided to seek care at Conceptions in Littleton, Colorado. We based our decisions primarily off of their success rates both within the state and on a national level. We also felt like we weren’t “just a number” at this clinic and we felt truly cared for; we were comfortable.

The first round…

After scrounging up any cash we had lying around and some considerable help from my stepdad Rich, we went for it. And by it, I mean in vitro fertilization (IVF).

People often don’t realize how long of a process IVF can be. At first. I didn’t understand the scope of the process. At our clinic you can count on a minimum of three months for a successful IVF round. The first month is a suppressive month. During this time, they essentially take control of your ovaries (in a hormonal sense) so that you can have the best outcome during the stimulation month.

The stimulation month is a bit of a rollercoaster and it requires one hell of a commitment. We live about four hours from the clinic and frequent day trips are required as well as several overnight stays.

Day one of an IVF cycle is the first day of your period. You know what comes next? A super fun transvaginal ultrasound (who I named Debbie) while Aunt Flow is in town. The purpose of the ultrasound is to make sure that everything is in tip-top shape going into the IVF cycle. Once you get the green light, you start “stimming”. Starting on day five of your cycle, you start getting monitored every day until the egg retrieval. During this time I stayed with my sister Jessica who lived about twenty minutes from the clinic.

The shots never really bothered me too much. There were lots (up to five needle pokes in one day), but that didn’t compare to the intense and irrational emotional outbursts that consumed me. The term “crying over spilt milk” doesn’t do it justice.

The medications really are something else though. Here is what my schedule looked like:

AM:

· Menopur (promotes the development of multiple follicles and eggs)

· Omnitrope (human growth hormone, that can help with follicle development and egg quality)

· Cetrotide (taken close to egg retrieval to prevent natural ovulation)

PM:

· Gonal-F (promotes follicle development)

· Menopur

Meds for round #1

During every office visit they would measure each follicle I had. Once I had several follicles that were ready, I was told to “trigger”. More shots: specifically, two. These two shots are timed perfectly. I had to give them exactly 36 hours prior to my egg retrieval. These medications help your eggs mature, which allows them to be fertilized.

Drawing up my trigger!

Our retrieval…

On July 25, 2019, we had our first egg retrieval. In the morning, we briefly met with the anesthesiologist and then I proceeded to have a nice nap. Jeremiah had some work to do as well, if you catch my drift. He was taken to a private room, which came equipped with methods of “encouragement” so that he could give the clinic some of his little swimmers.

During the egg retrieval, they used a vaginal ultrasound guided needle to aspirate each of my follicles in order to remove the eggs. It sounds rough, but you’re in a drug-induced slumber and don’t really care at the time.

When I woke up, we got our first update; 15 eggs were retrieved! The next update would come the next day.

We got our first update from embryology the next day. Of the 15 retrieved, 11 were mature, and nine of those were fertilized. We had nine! Off to a good start!

Now we waited and waited and waited some more. On day five we got an update. There were three embryos left but none of them were developed enough to be frozen (mature blastocysts). They let them develop overnight and were able to freeze all of them the next day. We were so relieved!

The recovery process was a bit rough for me. I was very bloated and had a lot of stomach and back pain. The pain lasted about two weeks but eventually I went back to normal again.

PGS testing…

During the initial phases of IVF, we opted to do preimplantation genetic screening (PGS). For this test, they take a small biopsy of the embryo before freezing it and send it for testing. The goal of this testing is to verify that the embryo is compatible with life through chromosomal evaluation. We were expected to wait up to two weeks for results.

More waiting. During this time, I was distracted by my dad who managed to have coronary artery bypass surgery in August. When I found out, I was on my way to Denver for more IVF testing. I immediately turned around and we headed for Missouri. Helping Dad kept Jeremiah and I both distracted.

After waiting two weeks for results, I called the clinic. They had not gotten any results yet but assured me that they would let me know when they came in. After nearly four weeks I grew inpatient. I called again. This time they said they would call the testing company directly.

The embryology department called within a few hours. They had results. I was scared and nervous. I called for Jeremiah to come into the room and I put the phone on speaker. The embryologist on the other end told us that all of the embryos were abnormal. What? No! This wasn’t supposed to happen. I remember asking the embryologist what was wrong with the embryos, but I honestly can’t remember what she said due to the shock. After hanging up, we cried for what seemed like hours.

We were still in Missouri helping out Dad, so we powered through.

Once we were able to come home with Dad, I was able to obtain the testing results from our embryos:

· #1: 46 chromosomes, XY; Deletion/Duplication on chromosome 6

· #2: 53 chromosomes, XX; Trisomy on chromosomes 1, 4, 7, 9, 19, 21, 22

· #3: 69 chromosomes, XXX; additional chromosome for every pair

Hot. Mess.

After a couple weeks, we had our regroup with our doctor. During the meeting she informed us that two of the abnormal embryos were maternal linked. Now we had a second diagnosis: diminished egg quality.

After speaking with the doctor, we took some time to grieve. It was a loss. It was both emotionally and financially devastating. We weren’t going to give up though. Not yet.

Summer 2020…

Starting in late 2019, I started working PRN at a hospital in Montrose. This allowed us to start saving money for another egg retrieval. We understood the financial burden that IVF can cause, but we didn’t want it to affect our way of life.

In May 2020, we had our second egg retrieval. We got 10 eggs; three were mature and all fertilized. This time one made it to mature blastocyst and was able to be biopsied for PGS testing. We were disappointed but hopeful.

Recovery this time around was a piece of cake. I relaxed for a few days, but pain was pretty minimal.

About a week later, we were prepping to go on a Jeep trail when I got a call from embryology. I yelled for Jeremiah and we put the phone on speaker. They had the PGS testing results. Normal! The embryo was perfect! Yes! We were elated with the news. It gave us hope.

After processing the news and doing more thinking, we decided to do a third retrieval to see if we could bank more embryos. With IVF there are no guarantees that each embryo transfer will result in a successful pregnancy and we were really hoping for two children.

In July we had our third egg retrieval. This time we were very disappointed with the initial result; five eggs retrieved. Of those five, two fertilized but both made it to mature blastocyst. After PGS testing was completed, we found out that one was normal. The other had a deletion/duplication on chromosome 11.

Waiting for retrieval #3

We had two normal embryos and we felt great! Now we would progress to the next steps of IVF.

Uterine Testing…

Once you have embryos, my clinic does more testing to make sure your uterus is in optimal condition. In August 2020, I had a trial embryo transfer, hysteroscopy, uterine doppler, and an endometrial receptivity analysis (ERA).

The trial transfer was a piece of cake. During this procedure they place the same catheter that would be used for the transfer into the uterus just to make sure there aren’t any issues; there weren’t. The doppler just made sure my blood flow to and from my uterus was adequate. It was slightly abnormal but nothing too serious. The hysteroscopy was a nightmare. To this day, that was the most pain I have ever experienced. I don’t think I have ever cussed that much in my life. For the procedure they rapidly instill fluid into the uterus to force it to expand which allows for pictures to be taken in order to verify there are no fibroids or other abnormalities. That was also normal.

The final procedure was the ERA. We opted for that because of the limited number of embryos we had. This test provides a timed window when an embryo should be transferred. For the ERA, I had to prep like I was going to have a transfer but instead of transferring an embryo, they biopsies my endometrial lining.

Once all the testing was completed, we had to decide on when we were going to transfer an embryo. We opted to wait until November due to my work schedule.